Do you live in one of the most miserable places in Maryland?
Only a third of Marylanders say they are truly happy. That’s too bad, considering that folks in Maryland don’t really have it too bad in the grand scheme of things.
But, we were curious – which Maryland cities might be the most miserable? We’re about to find out, using Saturday Night Science and data.
After analyzing the 42 largest cities, we sadly present the most miserable cities in the Old Line State.
Table Of Contents: Top Ten | Methodology | Summary | Table
The 10 Most Miserable Places In Maryland
Read on below to see how we crunched the numbers and how your town ranked. If you have a smile on your face, you probably don’t live in one of these cities.
Oh, and by the way, Ocean City is the happiest place in Maryland.
For more Maryland reading, check out:
The 10 Most Miserable Places In Maryland For 2023
/10
Population: 9,591
Poverty Level: 8.7%
Median Home Price $302,200
Married Households 2.0%
Households With Kids 36.86%
More on Bladensburg: Data | Crime | Cost Of Living
/10
Population: 5,927
Poverty Level: 14.1%
Median Home Price $278,600
Married Households 2.0%
Households With Kids 33.4%
More on District Heights: Data | Crime | Cost Of Living
/10
Population: 13,574
Poverty Level: 7.0%
Median Home Price $312,800
Married Households 2.0%
Households With Kids 34.32%
More on New Carrollton: Data | Crime | Cost Of Living
/10
Population: 7,578
Poverty Level: 8.6%
Median Home Price $276,300
Married Households 19.0%
Households With Kids 34.55%
More on Brunswick: Data | Crime | Cost Of Living
/10
Population: 6,341
Poverty Level: 6.0%
Median Home Price $334,900
Married Households 4.0%
Households With Kids 41.47%
More on Glenarden: Data | Crime | Cost Of Living
/10
Population: 10,054
Poverty Level: 3.0%
Median Home Price $343,000
Married Households 12.0%
Households With Kids 35.61%
More on La Plata: Data | Crime | Cost Of Living
/10
Population: 7,321
Poverty Level: 11.8%
Median Home Price $372,100
Married Households 3.0%
Households With Kids 40.08%
More on Riverdale Park: Data | Crime | Cost Of Living
/10
Population: 5,666
Poverty Level: 0.5%
Median Home Price $533,100
Married Households 9.0%
Households With Kids 45.89%
More on Poolesville: Data | Cost Of Living
/10
Population: 6,273
Poverty Level: 6.5%
Median Home Price $252,600
Married Households 33.0%
Households With Kids 26.32%
More on Hampstead: Data | Crime | Cost Of Living
/10
Population: 7,183
Poverty Level: 9.2%
Median Home Price $266,500
Married Households 33.0%
Households With Kids 31.67%
More on Taneytown: Data | Crime | Cost Of Living
Methodology: How We Measured The Most Miserable Cities In The Old Line State
To rank the unhappiest places in Maryland, we had to determine what criteria make people happy. It isn’t a stretch to assume that happy people earn great salaries, are relatively stress-free, and have a stable home life.
So we went to the Census’s American Community Survey 2017-2021 report for the happy criteria, flipped the list with Saturday Night Science, and it spit out the answer.
Like magic.
Here are the criteria we used to measure misery:
- Percentage of residents with a college degree
- Average commute times
- Unemployment rates
- Cost of living
- % of married couples
- % of families with kids
- Poverty rate
After we decided on the criteria, we gathered the data for the 42 places in Maryland with over 5,000 people.
We then ranked each place from one to 42 for each of the seven criteria, with a score of one being the most miserable (Any ties were given to the larger place).
Next, we averaged the seven rankings into a Miserable Index for each place with the lowest overall Miserable Index “earning” the title “Most Miserable City In Maryland.”
If you’d like to see the complete list of states, most miserable to happiest, scroll to the bottom of this post to see the unabridged chart.
We updated this article for 2023, and it’s our tenth time ranking the most miserable cities in Maryland.
There You Have It – The Least Happy Cities In Maryland
As we said earlier, trying to determine the most miserable cities in Maryland is usually a subjective matter.
But if you’re analyzing cities where people are not stable, where you’re stuck in traffic, and no one spent the time to go to college, then this is an accurate list.
If you’re curious enough, here are the happiest cities in Maryland, according to science:
- Ocean City
- Havre de Grace
- Annapolis
For more Maryland reading, check out:
- Best Places To Live In Maryland
- Cheapest Places To Live In Maryland
- Most Dangerous Cities In Maryland
- Richest Cities In Maryland
- Safest Places In Maryland
- Worst Places To Live In Maryland
- Most Expensive Places To Live In Maryland
Miserable Cities In Maryland For 2023
| Rank | City | Population | Poverty Level | Median Home Value | % Married | % Kids |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 1 | Bladensburg, MD | 9,591 | 8.7% | $302,200 | 2.0% | 36.86% |
| 2 | District Heights, MD | 5,927 | 14.1% | $278,600 | 2.0% | 33.4% |
| 3 | New Carrollton, MD | 13,574 | 7.0% | $312,800 | 2.0% | 34.32% |
| 4 | Brunswick, MD | 7,578 | 8.6% | $276,300 | 19.0% | 34.55% |
| 5 | Glenarden, MD | 6,341 | 6.0% | $334,900 | 4.0% | 41.47% |
| 6 | La Plata, MD | 10,054 | 3.0% | $343,000 | 12.0% | 35.61% |
| 7 | Riverdale Park, MD | 7,321 | 11.8% | $372,100 | 3.0% | 40.08% |
| 8 | Poolesville, MD | 5,666 | 0.5% | $533,100 | 9.0% | 45.89% |
| 9 | Hampstead, MD | 6,273 | 6.5% | $252,600 | 33.0% | 26.32% |
| 10 | Taneytown, MD | 7,183 | 9.2% | $266,500 | 33.0% | 31.67% |
| 11 | Hagerstown, MD | 43,015 | 25.5% | $164,400 | 20.0% | 32.52% |
| 12 | Elkton, MD | 15,724 | 21.2% | $218,200 | 13.0% | 30.55% |
| 13 | Greenbelt, MD | 24,602 | 16.0% | $244,800 | 4.0% | 28.09% |
| 14 | Salisbury, MD | 32,583 | 24.8% | $170,200 | 9.0% | 28.25% |
| 15 | Bowie, MD | 58,113 | 3.3% | $362,800 | 8.0% | 30.48% |
| 16 | Laurel, MD | 29,438 | 9.8% | $296,300 | 5.0% | 31.39% |
| 17 | Chesapeake Beach, MD | 6,303 | 4.3% | $383,900 | 18.0% | 38.52% |
| 18 | Thurmont, MD | 6,247 | 7.0% | $284,800 | 27.0% | 33.09% |
| 19 | Fruitland, MD | 5,455 | 15.3% | $160,400 | 23.0% | 33.16% |
| 20 | Frederick, MD | 76,376 | 10.1% | $289,000 | 12.0% | 32.77% |
| 21 | Mount Rainier, MD | 8,290 | 7.9% | $427,800 | 1.0% | 20.42% |
| 22 | Baltimore, MD | 592,211 | 20.3% | $175,300 | 13.0% | 23.59% |
| 23 | Takoma Park, MD | 17,610 | 7.9% | $625,200 | 4.0% | 38.25% |
| 24 | Cambridge, MD | 13,026 | 23.3% | $192,300 | 24.0% | 28.63% |
| 25 | Cumberland, MD | 19,028 | 19.9% | $105,700 | 27.0% | 26.23% |
| 26 | Cheverly, MD | 6,191 | 8.4% | $385,500 | 4.0% | 22.78% |
| 27 | Manchester, MD | 5,350 | 4.8% | $316,100 | 38.0% | 31.08% |
| 28 | Aberdeen, MD | 16,176 | 15.8% | $203,700 | 20.0% | 30.0% |
| 29 | Walkersville, MD | 6,134 | 1.8% | $347,900 | 26.0% | 34.29% |
| 30 | Mount Airy, MD | 9,621 | 4.6% | $392,000 | 23.0% | 40.93% |
| 31 | Gaithersburg, MD | 68,827 | 10.9% | $427,400 | 5.0% | 34.12% |
| 32 | Hyattsville, MD | 20,790 | 9.2% | $380,900 | 3.0% | 28.01% |
| 33 | Westminster, MD | 19,783 | 12.2% | $258,400 | 22.0% | 27.51% |
| 34 | Frostburg, MD | 7,282 | 26.9% | $149,000 | 14.0% | 25.27% |
| 35 | Rockville, MD | 67,095 | 7.0% | $554,800 | 5.0% | 30.03% |
| 36 | Bel Air, MD | 10,663 | 17.2% | $256,700 | 19.0% | 22.01% |
| 37 | Easton, MD | 16,912 | 9.8% | $287,600 | 16.0% | 29.87% |
| 38 | Cheste, MD | 5,557 | 19.3% | $267,800 | 7.0% | 20.97% |
| 39 | College Park, MD | 34,961 | 25.3% | $359,300 | 2.0% | 18.14% |
| 40 | Annapolis, MD | 40,581 | 9.2% | $428,600 | 15.0% | 25.45% |
| 41 | Havre De Grace, MD | 14,625 | 10.2% | $293,800 | 22.0% | 24.75% |
| 42 | Ocean City, MD | 6,869 | 8.8% | $317,100 | 17.0% | 7.25% |